sick

this week i've been really sick, and with each passing day i've gotten progressively worse. according to webmd, i've been stricken with either: a.) certain death, or b.) the flu.

i feel [and look] like i've been run over by a bus, dragged for a couple of miles by the aforementioned bus, and then hit by several very large trucks. my entire body aches [especially my head], i have chills, a fever, and i'm pretty sure there's enough pressure built up in my face that an explosion will almost certainly occur in the very near future.

somehow, i've been able to muster enough energy and strength to drag myself to school and teach my classes as enthusiastically as possible. i've never asked my school for anything, aside from permission to sleep in peace at my desk in the afternoon [this week, i don't have any classes after lunch time].

however, this morning [due to the fact that i felt particularly crap-tastic, and incredibly dizzy] i asked my coteacher [who shall remain nameless] if i could leave for only 30 minutes after lunch to go to the doctor. i didn't think it was asking for much. i mean, i wasn't asking her or anyone else to come with me. my intention was to struggle through the doctors visit using my limited korean skills + my bangin' charade skills. [i'm pretty much left to fend for myself anyways...so i'm used to it...] also, the doctor's office is literally a 2 minute walk down the street from my school. the entire trip could not possibly take more than half and hour. [i planned to return to school after the doctor visit, which i told her.]

when i asked her on tuesday, she told me [in no uncertain terms] that "suffering builds character". [although, i think that whoever said this quote originally intended it to mean suffering from persecution, not illness. whatevs.] but today, i suppose she lost all of her patience with me. about 5 minutes after what i thought was a perfectly legitimate and innocent request, she got all up in my face and said the following: "i have a real problem with you being sick. if you're going to keep being sick, then i'm going to write you a negative performance review."

seriously, what the heck. i mean, it's not like i can really help being sick [aside from living in one of those plastic bubbles so that i never come in contact with the outside world]. also, it's not like i wanted to be sick, or purposely became sick. i wasn't even asking to take a sick day. i wasn't asking to sleep during my classes instead of teaching. i'm obviously legitimately very sick. i mean, you can pretty much tell by looking at me. so i don't know what her problem is.

additionally, it should be noted that during the past [almost] 2 years of teaching at this school, i have only ever taken ONE FREAKING SICK DAY. why?? becuase i had the SWINE FLU. i had a note from the doctor and everything, that explicitly said [in korean, to avoid any language confusion] that i was to have a full week off of school, to avoid contaminating students and teachers with the swine flu. however, this same coteacher only allowed me to take one day off of work. ohh yeah, and to prove that i was dying and needed the day off, i had to walk all the way to school so that she could watch the nurse take my temperature. the thermometer reading? 104 degrees. and after seeing that i had a super high fever, she still had the audacity to ask the nurse if i could teach. the nurse looked at her like she was a crazy person. so guess who inadvertently started the swine flu epidemic at my school?!? yeah, it was me. [i should add that, during that hellish week of teaching with a 104 degree fever, i cried every afternoon while sleeping at my desk, and i passed out while teaching a class of 3rd graders, who have now probably all been scarred for life.]

the thing that makes me the most frustrated is that whenever this same coteacher even has a slight headache, she leaves school. but she won't even allow the same consideration for me. i mean, i can work with headaches. but fever and chills?? a little bit harder to put up with. also, according to my contract, i'm supposed to get 9 sick days. [i've taken a grand total of ZERO since renewing my contract.]

so, for the duration of my illness i have come up with a brilliant plan for revenge. she forgets that i have one thing that she doesn't have: FLU GERMS!! therefore, in between teaching and sleeping, i plan to use my free time coughing on her//her stuff as much as possible, as well as blowing my nose//sneezing and touching her things. mwahahaha.